2013-- a year of decisions.

Ben and I have been living in Korea for over a year now.  How wild is that?  There are times we still find it hard to believe.  We've been given this amazing opportunity, and we are thankful, daily, for it.  Soon our contract at our current school will be up, and we do intend to re-sign if possible.  If something ends up happening with the school, though, our current bosses will be moving us to another city to one of their other schools.  We haven't had a chance to iron out details yet, but our paperwork (apostilled FBI background check) from the States finally got back to us, and we're ready to get a new contract rolling.

One funny incident happened the other day, and Ben wanted me to relate it to you!  We were coming home from work, and as we got off our bus, we heard a weird keening sound.  It turned out to be a Korean guy belting (voice cracking, off key) out some nigh unrecognizable KPOP tune.  We were giggling about it as we went down to catch a subway, and Ben decided to start singing "I Love Beans" by Brak from Spaceghost Coast to Coast.  He'd only gotten a couple of lines in, and I was snickering when a little old Korean woman laughed out loud and said, "Good, very good!"  Ben originally thought she meant, "Good, beans are good!"  Though what she actually said was slightly less entertaining, we were both nevertheless pretty tickled about it.  We love it when Koreans play along with our foreign silliness.  :)

This month I've been having a bit of a mid-twenties crisis.  It sounds funny, but it's true.  As some of you know, Ben and I moved to Korea so we could save money for my make-up education.  It was my hope to go to a reputable establishment with a focus in make-up for film.  However, after doing further research on my preferred school, I realized they couldn't offer me what I needed as far as practicum for prosthetics and other SFX work.  So I started looking for other schools, and while I found some that were perfectly acceptable, I also found a lot of negative feedback from make-up school students in general.  Several industry sources have stated clearly that they would be less likely to hire graduates from a make-up school, and that it would be better for aspiring artists (in any creative field) to try their hand at the real thing or learn from actual people working in the industry.

Were we still living in Arkansas, that would be a tough thing to hear.  The only people in my field in Arkansas focus on bridal work or print work for local magazines.  That's not what I want to do.  I want to do film so badly it makes me depressed thinking I'll have to settle for less doing the same.  The thing is, I don't even care if I'm on big films.  I'd be happy enough to get paid doing small indie productions.  And if I get a golden opportunity to even clean brushes for an artist on set of a large-scale production, well, of course I'd take it.

I'm really having to re-evaluate my goals and plans for the future.  It's scary for me to think we'll have spent 2 years over here in another country saving money up for a school that MAY just be a money trap, when we could use that money for something more useful in the long-run.  It's terrifying to think I have that kind of power over our future plans.  Ben is amazing and supportive and wants me to do what I want with my career.  Thinking that I could make a huge career mistake by (a) going to school, or (b) moving somewhere and trying to break into the industry alone, really makes this whole having dreams thing seem like a nightmare.  I'm having to decide what is really important to me for the future.  Yes, I want to work in film, but I don't want to put us in debilitating debt on the hopes that someday I'll be rich and able to support us both.  Yes, we both want to live in a large-ish city.  Yes, we both want to have kids, and I'd rather not wait until I'm 40 to have them!

The honest truth is that for a prosthetics/SFX artist, work is few and far between unless you can get set up with a reliable workshop that can employ you year-round (e.g., WETA).  For straight-up make-up artists, it's a little better for freelancers who don't cringe overmuch at doing commercial or bridal work.

I apologize for the depressing turn this blog has taken, and that I've stopped talking about Korea for a bit.  I don't know what we are going to do yet.  We have a year to figure it out.  I'm not throwing out the school option, but now I'm also looking at cities in the U.S. (barring Hollywood, sorry) that have a decent film industry (at least with independent films).  I pin all these things on Pinterest about following your dreams, but the shadow under it all is the uncertainty and general scariness of actually making a decision!  For now, I will be doing more research on all fronts and working on small make-up projects around Seoul.  I already have a 3-shoot series I designed set up with my favorite photographer, and a really great model.  All I can do right now is work on my portfolio and keep up hope.

Cheers!